Just stuff

I’m going to say up front that my life is boring. I do basically the same thing everyday (work, spend time with Parker, help Parker with homework, cook dinner, my own homework, read to Parker, housework, bed). So, I guess I don’t have much to blog about… although I really like blogging. I am not one to get super-de-duper personal on this blog… but maybe that’s what I want? So, I’ve been thinking for awhile now about friends (and enemies). I have had 3 or 4 really good friends in my life, but it’s really hard to find a good friend, someone that is trusting and non-judgmental and all that. As an adult it’s even harder. When I moved from Utah to Idaho I left behind a few good friends. It was really hard to leave them, knowing I probably wouldn’t find friends like them in Idaho. The few friends I had in Utah knew me, like REALLY knew me (all of me). When I came to Idaho I knew it would be a new start. A place where nobody knew me, which I thought was a good thing. It’s nice that nobody knows my demons and past and shit… but it’s also lonely. I feel like I’ve hidden my true self. Tonight I went to dinner with some friends. It was a lot of fun and I really like these friends… but it’s still hard for me. I wonder if they knew the real me if they would still like me? I know EVERYONE says, “of course I would!” But how often does someone say that, then realize they didn’t mean it. I don’t even know if I’m even making sense. Ugh. I don’t know. I don’t want to air my crazy… but I also want to have friends who know and understand the real me.

Crap, I don’t know what I’m saying.

I miss blogging

It’s been awhile! My life is actually pretty boring, so blogging isn’t all that fun… but I when I read all my friend’s blogs I get all jealous and stuff. So.

Parker started school a week ago tomorrow. He’s so super cute. He’s in 7th grade this year and is so trendy and fun. He has a little girlfriend (who is a cheerleader, which he likes to remind people of). She is a nice girl and I’m okay with the girlfriend thing for now… I mean, as long as they don’t touch, like… not even elbows :) Having a kid is expensive and stressful, but it’s pretty fun too. Parker and I have a lot of fun together… we seriously laugh a ton! He is hilarious and says the funniest things. Like today while eating at Panda Express he says “I see Mexicans working at Chinese places and Chinese people working at Mexican places… can they do that?” I really wanted to die laughing. He is so innocent sometimes! He’s become a lot more social lately, which is good for him. He joined Boy Scouts and went on a Scout camp last weekend. He loves it! It gives him time to do “guy” stuff. He is super interested in singing and has LOVED choir. He also likes sports and has gone to a couple football games (which may be due to his girlfriend being a cheerleader). He can’t play sports until next month because of his knee injury, but he’s excited to play basketball, baseball, and “maybe” track.

The weather is getting cooler and I LOVE it! Although summer is nice, I LOVE fall! I love when it rains and is misty and about 65 degrees :)

Isn’t he cute?

And Princess LOVES him! But notice he can’t be separated from his phone :) Wouldn’t want to miss a text from his girlyfriend.

BBQ Chicken

We had a TON of leftover Creamy Lemon Pasta from last night… So tonight I made BBQ Chicken breasts to go along with the pasta. I also made a salad with spinach, romaine lettuce, broccoli slaw (YUM), tomatoes, carrots, craisins, and a little bit of cheese. I topped it with raspberry vinaigrette. It was DELICIOUS! Parker doesn’t like salad, but I made him eat a little! He LOVED the BBQ chicken, and liked the pasta about the same as last night. I didn’t eat lunch today, so I was STARVING and forgot to take pictures. But it was yummy! :)

Creamy Lemon Pasta with Asparagus

http://find.myrecipes.com/recipes/recipefinder.dyn?action=displayRecipe&recipe_id=2001161

I made this tonight. It was YUMMY. Parker added a little extra cheese because he thought it was a little to lemony… Picky picky :) It was gooooood!! The asparagus and tomato added so much flavor! MMMM… I have a TON of leftovers, but I think it will be good with some chicken added in :) Yummy. So, recipe #2 a success!

Cooking

Okay, so I don’t like to cook… Or so I thought! Lately I’ve decided that I need to make healthier meals for Parker and I. I have dreaded it because honestly, it’s easier to make unhealthy, boxed food. I also need to save money by not eating out… but I miss some of the yummy stuff I get at restaurants… So… I decided I have to start cooking. Well, tonight I made spinach artichoke dip from scratch and it was YUMMY! Parker thought it was too artichoky, but what does he know :) The picture doesn’t do it justice… it really was tasty! And it was FUN to make! I made tacos tonight, which okay, isn’t the healthiest… but they were full of veggies and yummy!

I also made some popsicles from Raspberry Ice Sugar-Free Crystal Light. Parker LOVES them! I haven’t tasted them yet… but they seem pretty darn healthy :)

 

Tomorrow night I’m going to make: Creamy Lemon Pasta with Vegetables!

Let’s see if mine looks as good as http://find.myrecipes.com/recipes/recipefinder.dyn?action=displayRecipe&recipe_id=2001161 

I bought a lot of yummy veggies today at the store, including broccoli slaw… Have you had this stuff?? It is SOOOO good! Thanks to my sister’s boyfriend Coady for introducing it to me :)

A Bittersweet Birthday

I’m going to post twice today… Only because I had half a blog written and decided to write out some feelings about a completely different subject.

Today is Parker’s 13th Birthday. It has been such a fun day with early morning pancakes, decorations, presents, parties, pizza, candy, and fun. He has enjoyed the day and is so excited to be 13. His friends got him some fun gifts and of course he loves the AirSoft gun! But, he isn’t home with his parents. I can hear the sadness in my sister’s voice when she calls, knowing she isn’t here celebrating with her baby boy. I know, KNOW that Parker is absolutely supposed to be here with me. But it’s days like today that I hate seeing him away from his parents. While he is busy, he is okay… But I can tell he misses his mom and dad. I am just trying to make his day very special.

Happy Birthday Parker! I love you!

Life is so short

The internet is an amazing tool. It connects friends, family, and strangers… The Internet can be used for evil, but for the most part, it is a powerful tool. Facebook is one tool on the Internet I use often. It is fun to see what my friends and family are up to. I love to see photos and comments. I have to admit I’m a bit of a facebook/blog stalker. I enjoy reading posts by my friends and what their friends and family have to say. Recently on Facebook I was reading some posts by a friend. She talked about her dear friends and how their 2 year old daughter had nearly drowned. It gave a link to their blog, and of course, being the voyeur I am went to check it out. This very young couple, with a young beautiful little girl were experiencing such tragedy. The little girl was in ICU in Salt Lake and was just living on prayers. For days I checked their blog, checked on the little girl named Preslee. I was so hopeful and my heart was opened up to God, praying for a miracle. Yesterday when I checked their blog I found out with hundreds of other people that little Preslee did not survive. I sat at my computer and cried for this little girl. I have never met Preslee or her parents, I am only connected to them through mutual friends on facebook. I am so incredibly sad for this family. They were given such a short time with their daughter, and it seems so unfair. I struggle to find hope and meaning. How could a loving God take such a precious gift? Hundreds and hundreds of people (many probably strangers) commented on their blog that they were praying for Preslee. So why? Why weren’t the prayers of hundreds answered? I can’t stop thinking about this story. I can’t help but wonder how this could happen to such faithful people. Parker has been in my life for 5 months and I cannot imagine losing him. Somehow children burrow themselves into your heart and they force it to grow. I love Parker more that anything I have ever loved, and the thought of losing him is unbearable. It truly makes me realize how short and fragile life is. My heart is breaking and to be honest there is a big part of me that is angry. I don’t understand. Life is so unfair sometimes, and I know that is how it is… but it doesn’t make it any easier. I hope that Preslee’s parents can find more peace than I can. I pray they will be filled with comfort and support. I don’t normally link blogs due to privacy, but I feel like this is okay. Give them support. I believe even strangers can be comforting. http://patrickandashley.blogspot.com/

I’m going to go cuddle Parker and enjoy the moments I get with him.