30??

So, today I was reading back through my blog. I looked back at some of my first posts and laughed at myself. One that stuck out was a list of things I wanted to do before I was 30. Back then 30 seemed really far away… but this summer I will turn 29. I guess 30 isn’t so far away anymore. I have to laugh at some of my goals…

Here they are:

1) Go to Africa to work in an orphanage. (Well, this definitely won’t happen by August 11, 2012)
2) Learn a foreign language. (I guess I could still try to do this… hmmm… Maybe)
3) Own a Mustang (Car not horse) (HA, yeah right… unless I win the lottery!)
4) Have my Master's Degree. (YES, I will!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!)
5) Run a marathon (I HOPE SO!)
6) Live on my own (hahahaha, sad that that made the list) (YESS, It happened. LOL)
7) Have more than 127 dollars in my savings account. (nope, still hasn’t happened. I hope by 2012 it will)
8) Go on a cruise (conquer my fear of the ocean) (Maybe)
9) Finish my book. (Ha, well… maybe)
10) "quit" therapy. (Yep, I sure did!)

11) Skydive (We’ll see.)

12) Visit every state in the US (Doubtful)

Well, that’s my list. 30 isn’t so far away. Let’s see what I accomplish in the next year and a half!

 

Personally speaking

I don’t tend to talk a lot about my personal life on here. It isn’t because I don’t want to… but it’s hard to put into words some of the things I want to say or write. Life has gotten pretty stressful for me. When I got my paycheck on the 20th and realized how small it was I kind of panicked. I knew it was going to be short, I mean, I have to take a day off every week for this internship thing… but it was still a shock. Work has been really crazy lately. A student that I spent more than half of my day with was pulled out of school to be homeschooled. This all happened over a week ago. Then today, the school psychologist informed me that the other student I was trying to qualify probably WOULDN’T qualify. So, I’ve been a bum at work. I only have 2 clients right now, at 1 hour each. So, after 2 hours I’m done. I’ve tried to stay busy, but it’s pretty hard to pull stuff to do out of a hat. Because of this lack of work, I feel I’m starting to be viewed as a slacker. I HATE that feeling. I’m NOT a slacker. Trust me, I would rather have my day full of things to do! But, the special ed teacher does have some students to qualify for PSR, so I hope it all works out SOON. I hate feeling worthless at work. I want to go to work feeling productive, but lately I have to force myself to even get out of bed.

My internship is going really well. My supervisor is really knowledgeable and has been teaching me a TON! 2 of my clients cancelled their appointments this week, so that was kind of stressful. I have to have 100 hours by March 18th. Right now I’m at 60. I am worried about money and hours when April starts… because then I will need 300 hours in 3 months instead of 100. I know it will work out… I just have to make it through until December, then I’ll be DONE!!

Parker is doing really well. Basketball is almost over (thankfully)! He has LOVED playing, and has become really close with his teammates (well, all but 2). He’ll finish up just in time to sign up for baseball. I feel like we are always running somewhere, busy doing something. He is doing A LOT better this trimester in school. The trimester ends on the 6th, and I think he might finish on the honor roll… that is if he can' bring his health grade up a bit. He has really struggled in health for some reason.

I chopped my hair off. When I made the appointment I thought I was just going to get a trim… but when I got there I just wanted it all chopped off! I really like the cut, it’s just hard to get used to I’ve started walking on the treadmill again. I did 1 mile in 21 minutes on Wednesday, then 1 mile in 19.57 on Thursday. The times aren’t great, but I felt good after. I know I should do more than 1 mile, but I have to start somewhere. I hope to do a mile tonight too, but I’m going to dinner with a friends, so I may not have time. I’m just trying to be a more healthy person. I want to set a good example for Parker, and so far I haven’t been great at doing that. Fast food is so much easier when we have so much going on… but I’ve been cooking a lot more often, and a lot more healthy. Last night we had really tasty chicken wraps on tomato basil wraps. MMM.

I’ve been a little melancholy lately. I don’t know if it’s because I went off my sleeping pills or what? The sleeping pills were an old school anti-depressant, so maybe they were helping me out a little more than just sleep?

Well, that’s me.

Time flies!

I can’t believe I’m going into my 7th week of internship! Time is flying by faster than I ever thought possible! I always knew I wanted to be a therapist, but now I know more than ever that I’m doing the right thing with my life. I look forward to Wednesday’s… and wish that I could intern EVERYDAY! I wish I had unlimited money so I didn’t need a job to support me through this time. But, I don’t… such is life! Although I like my job at the school, it definitely isn’t want I want to do for the rest of my life. I know now more than ever that I haven’t wasted any time in school. I would hate to get to this point only to not want to be a therapist!

Nothing new really happens other than work, internship, Parker’s basketball practices and games, cleaning, cooking, and driving… I just thought I’d update my blog background to represent my love for Princess. Plus, someone I blog-stalk had the same background as me and it freaked me out. LOL

Happy day off tomorrow!

Love is…

Love is:

♥ Happy  Valentine’s Singles Awareness Day everyone ♥

♥♥♥♥♥♥

Yep, February is pretty sweet this year! I love my internship! It is so great to put all my “book work” experience into actual experience! Sometimes it is stressful, but most of all I love it! My supervisor is great and teaches me SO much! I can’t believe it’s been 5 weeks already! Time is flying by! I am feeling much more confident in myself as a therapist. There are definitely ^highs and _lows  but overall it is great!

Parker made me dinner tonight. So that was AMAZING! He is such a great kid and I ♥ him like crazy  His grades are improving more and more everyday! He is very smart and respectful and basically awesome!

Um, well… not much is really new. I know that’s surprising… but yeah. Parker is still loving basketball and is sad ski school is over. Princess still loves chicken treats. It’s still colder than… I don’t know what… but COLD. I’m really sick of cold, therefore I changed my blog background to a springy theme I think that will help!

So, I hope y’all are having a great February!

P.S. Aren’t Biggest Loser and American Idol SO great this season?

Something I ♥

Okay, I told you I was going to work on this lovin’ February thing… So, today (and everyday) I love being a therapist! I have been in school forever, so it’s nice to know that I love what I do… It would really suck to start practicing and hate it! But, I ♥♥♥♥♥ it! I intern for 8-10 hours on Wednesdays. It’s a long day, but it is so rewarding! I love putting what I’ve learned into practice. It is honestly the best job EVER and I can’t wait to do this EVERYDAY for the rest of my life. So, yay!

Here are some fun cartoons. I especially like the 2-for-1 Wednesday’s cartoon. LOL

So far, loving February 2011

♥

 

A hard month

February is a hard month for me. Not only is it the month of Valentine’s Day (which isn’t any fun when you are single), but there is a bunch of other anniversary type days this month. February 18, 2000 I married my high school sweetheart. I don’t think anyone gets married thinking they will divorce, I know I didn’t. Bronson was honestly the greatest guy while we were dating. He was respectful and caring and giving. Unfortunately, it didn’t last. After 4 years of marriage we divorced (for yucky reasons). February 18th this year would be our 11 year anniversary. Even though we’ve been divorced 7 years, its hard. Should it be? I don’t know, but it is. It gets easier every year. I don’t regret the divorce. I don’t love Bronson anymore. But I miss being married. I miss having a companion. I miss cuddling, kissing, traveling, talking, and the consistency and support from a man. 17 was too young to get married!

February 29, 2000 my dad died from a heart attack. I had been married 9 days. I grew up with a sick dad. When I was 7 he had a triple bypass surgery and told him he would probably only live 3-4 more years. I got 10. I am grateful I had my dad as long as I did. 17 is too young to lose a dad. 11 years has passed, but I continue to miss him everyday. I wish he could see me now, the successful me. I think the hardest part is knowing that one of the last things my dad said to me was, “you will get married over my dead body”. I know I didn’t kill my dad (after years of therapy), but it is a hard pill to swallow, knowing how disappointed my dad was in me. I wish he could see the woman I have become. I wish he could know his grandkids. It is hard not having a definite faith in God and an afterlife. I do know that my dad suffered. He was in pain and sick for many, many years. He has to be pain free now, wherever he is.

Me and my dad on my wedding day. I look like a teenage boy! Isn’t my dad so cute

 Miss you daddy.

So this February I’m going to try to think of all the great things in my life. Sometimes it gets too easy for me to wallow in my sadness. I don’t want to be sad anymore… I want to wake up knowing that I have things to live for, things that make me happy, things I love. So, of course the first thing I love is Parker. This kid has made me realize how great motherhood is. He is a goofy kid, but he is so smart and respectful and fun! Just last night we were eating out (our weekly date). The waitress commented on how mature he seems for his age. He goes out of his way to make sure I’m happy and healthy (he’s checked my temperature like 100 times since I’ve been sick). I can’t believe it’s been almost a year since he moved to Idaho to live with me! Time flies!

Isn’t he handsome?

♥ Happy February ♥